Going for a couple counseling does not mean that your relationship is broken, it just means that it needs maintenance. Living a life full of distress is not easy at all. It is difficult for the partner’s physical well being and mental well being. Many times it happens that you are not able to deal with the challenges that occur in a relationship. And because of this, you face conflicting situations and a lot of stress and loneliness. Maintaining a happy and long term relationship is not that easy. And when it gets tough you sometimes need what we call as outside help or counseling.
Sometimes being in a marriage is like you are stuck in the middle of the ocean and waiting for connections and solutions for the problems you are facing. And when there is a lack of trust, then continuing a relation seems difficult for you, making a bridge back to the partner seems difficult for you.
When empirically seen, couple therapy brings positive results that actually last.
Reasons to visit a couple counselor
Broken trust issues
The trust of either of the partner is broken in any form. It may be in the form of having sex with the other person, or it may be telling lies for money or some other things, or it may be having an affair with someone else. Forming trust again is possible only if both partners are willing to express their views, thoughts, and feelings over this freely. Many couples come for couple counseling with this issue.
Arguments that are getting more frequent
When you look up your day to day routine, you find that there are more and more arguments. Although the arguments are quite small in nature they bring a lot of trauma with them. When there is an increase in the pattern of these arguments, you should go for couples counseling or marriage counseling. Constant arguing reflects some serious problems in your relationship and seeking help becomes important because living in such a conflicting relation may lead to constant stress and mental torture.
Having a lack of communication means that you feel yourself being misunderstood and ignored. You may not be having any idea of what is happening to your spouse’s emotional status because of poor communication. When you go for a couple counseling the most important thing therapy does is improve your communication pattern and make it more of a positive sort, its quality is improved. You will be heard, understood, and get connected with your spouse.
Not able to talk freely
When you are in a conflicting relationship, you are not fully free in front of your spouse. You may be in a fear of his or her reaction over the things you want to share with them. Now when you are in therapy, the counselor will help you overcome the fear and you will be able to talk freely with your spouse. A counselor is a person for you to talk about the things which make you fearful of something.
One partner may become dysfunctional during a conflict
The way you handle conflicts is one of the important things to look into in a marital relationship. In many cases, one partner usually doesn’t want to face any conflicts and because of which he or she starts to ignore it by lashing him or her out in other rooms, or maybe moving out of the house for sometimes till everything becomes normal. But because of this, the problem becomes worse.
Diminishing of the emotional intimacy
You two feel that the spark which was there earlier in your marriage is diminished and you have now become more of a sort of roommates and the word soul mates have now gone from your life. The reason may be that everything changes with time or the reason may be that your needs are fulfilled somewhere else. So in such case a couple counselor will help to bring emotional intimacy or the spark back to their life.
Sexual relationship is also a reason for a problem in a relationship. It may be that one spouse is daily complaining about their bad sex life. Yes changes occur over time and it is a part of life but sometimes it may be frustrating for one or both the partners. Your partner is facing physical intimacy frequently and then it happens that it is reduced to zero, from fully satisfied to barely satisfied. You are trying to express your needs to the other partner and the other is continuously rejecting and using it as a bargaining tool. Whatever the issue may be, a couple counselor will help you overcome this.
Related: 9 Common Reasons People Get Divorce